Im writing this hoping that this post will help me realize my time restraints and force me to be focused.  The first draft of my research paper is due tomorrow, i have yet to find good reliable research, i have written the introduction.  I need to write about 2 and a half pages by tomorrow   A friend from out of town is coming to visit and i would like to get this paper out of the way.  I’d like to be in bed soon its already 11 pm.  Don’t procrastinate.  I got this.

Wow… not knowing is the worst, you’re imagination takes over and sometimes for the worst. I spent 4 years trying to understand my emotions, i experienced alot of clarity but right now i feel completely lost and confused.

I alwayz lose stuff it honestly sucks.   Right now its my cutting mat,  the thing is huge, im honestly starting to think that i am haunted by a ghost.  Everytime i lend something out it disappears.  First it was my flash drive and now its my cutting board.

I don’t know what is right for me, i don’t know what i want but this uncertainty kills me.  It clouds my thoughts and makes me want to go back to times where i felt more comfortable.  The same thoughts repeat themselves, its a viscous cycle.  This is general, and thats the way it should be.   My feelings are my feelings and i definitely don’t feel comfortable expressing them to the internet world.  Very few look at my boring piece of internet world anyway.  

I feel like i need to be single and not attached to anyone in order too be wildly successful. I’ve been hearing this from lots of people. I really hope i can have both someone to love and be successful at the same time.